Thanks for sharing what you did.
We can take the rest offline at some point.
I'm just wondering what the
overriding principle is for this principle, if there is one?
On one hand, the idea that my son would have to research all 50 states and sign every putative registry in existence to make sure that he retained rights to his child seems ridiculous and just wrong. And the fact that this really is the only way to be sure your child isn't placed and that most men on the planet don't even know what a putative registry is, makes the whole thing seem like a joke-- like an end-run around father's rights..."What, you didn't know you had to register as a putative father in every possible state? Well, sucks for you."
On the other hand as a woman, I know when you are carrying a child- the instinct to protect that child *no matter what* is over whelming. It would be hard for me as an expectant mother to hold "he has a right to know and be asked for consent" over the sacred duty I felt to protect my child and myself.
I'm not saying that every man that isn't notified was because he was a dangerous jerk...I'm positive there are injustices done to dads every day.
I'm just wondering how we avoid demonizing women who make hard choices like that as the mother to their child, and balance that with making sure that a man's right to raise his own child is also upheld and protected...