[Jessi_76]

Hi Erica,

We will all be more than happy to help you, and lend advice; this group is GREAT!!! Whether choosing domestic or international, is a very personal decision that many factors must weigh into. I will give you a little bit of info about why WE chose international vs. domestic, and then if you'd like to pm me, I'll be happy to give you information about our agency who has been beyond wonderful.

For us, we'd come to terms with not adopting a newborn. We felt in our situation, we'd rather make something really good out of a painful situation. We wanted to take the bad we've gone through and make something wonderful. To us, that meant giving a home to a child (or in our case, two children) who would otherwise NEVER, or may never, have that. We felt that with domestic adoption, any baby/newborn who is put up for adoption is pretty much guaranteed a loving home with a family who really wants a baby as there are waiting lists a mile long. The children in foreign countries, living in institutionalized settings aren't guaranteed that, or anything. These babies will change our lives, so we wanted to change theirs too. International is where we would make the biggest impact.

After all we'd been through, we wanted to get it right! We didn't want a failed adoption too. While there is never a guarantee with that, doing hard-core research helps!! We spent six solid months researching, interviewing and re-interviewing agencies to find the perfect one. And we did! To me, after meeting countless families adopting, it seems that agency selection makes all the difference - in ease of process, length of process (whether you're waiting two months or two years for a referral), etc. I'm sure MANY people here can share experiences with you privately on their agency and whther they would or would not recommend them.

I understand the pressure, the worry, and the risks with adoption, but honestly, as soon as we began looking into adoption, we KNEW it was the way to go. Our hearts were touched and captured forever. We too tried IVF to no avail, and all-in-all spent about $50k. I look back and cringe that that's what it took to get here, when in our hearts, we now know that this was the plan for our family all along. But it's a means to an end and we'll never wonder now, "what if" -- we truly believe that our five years of TTC prior to beginning adoption were because our children were not yet born. And now, six years after our journey began, we are on our way to legally adopt our two precious angels in court. We leave in just 8 days!!

Anyhow, I wish you the very best of luck, and look forward to following along on your magical journey!
Jessica