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Stay very available to the birthmother, no matter how freaked out you may be. Our son's birthmother reallly began to waiver one month before delivery. Total shock, as she and birthfather had totally committed to the placement with us at 6 weeks. Our first adoption, her first placement (she had two sons). It was a big shock but our agency was there to advise us and act as liaison. She cannot be pressured by anyone, the decision has to come from her. I am so sorry that you have to go through this, it is all part of a domestic adoption. We had a happy ending but it was a bear to take those phone calls from the agency about the possible change. If you practice a faith, now is the time to draw on that foundation. It is so out of your hands. Everyone involved in our adoption wanted what 'was in the best interest of the child'. Be strong and hang in there. If your kid is on their way to your family, nothing can stop it from happening. If you have a partner, take extra good care of them. And drink lots of herbal tea with a chaser of calming lavender eyepack, because this is a huge stressor. I do relate to the cost, as by the time we rec'd the call about the snafu, our expenses were over 22K. You can always PM me, I have been in your shoes and am now the loving mother to two wonderful children through open domestic adoption. They don't call adoption a roller coaster for nothing!
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