I am an adoptee reunited with my birth parents and they are married and have been 40 years. I was thrilled but in shock when I found my birth mother and found out they have been together all this time. I am sure what you are going through finding the right thing to say to your son must be so difficult but since he is asking about his birth father I would suggest telling him the truth. What I have found in my relationship with my bmom and bdad is that honesty is best even when it hurts. We have been reunited 2 1/2 years and I believe that the amount of time we spend together....every few months plus weekly phone calls.... sharing the truth about things has helped us the most. It hasn't been easy or come quickly but with time we are working through the things that are difficult to talk about. I also think sometimes the bdads are forgotten and think it is wonderful that your son wants to know about his. Just remember too every situation is different and you have to do what is best for you and your son.
|