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I have read many letters from potential birthmoms that do not want the father of their baby to parent.. and IMO they have reasons.. and heck the law is the law and the father of the baby has his rights and all he has to do is follow through.. and if he is not following through then IMO this shows his real desires.. If you want something you work for it..
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even our social worker made the comment (I think in adoption class)... that who knows the birthfather better than the birthmother? sometimes we have to trust the birthmother...
i can't shake the feeling of being uncomfortable fighting a biological parent... and in truth, i am glad that we are actually not fighting him, yet...
it's really is as simple as he has to do what the court said... and then he has to fight the birthmother ... not us... (we would certainly help the birthmother retain custody, though)
my husband and I are seriously considering moving the birthmother and her children here, near us. i am going out with a realtor on Friday to look at houses... fortunately, the cost of living here is very reasonable.. plus, it's a good time to buy a house...
anyhow... i am just looking... but i can't shake the feeling that part of this adoption saga is about us helping the birthmother..... that could just be my baggage.... but i am not so sure.
julie