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My thought is to stop. I realize you're trying to do what you feel is best BUT your son is going to realize that you are the one always trying to make contact and she is not. That is harmful.
1. Let her make the contact. If she wants to talk to him she will call.
2. Don't send any money or a phone card. Again if she wants to talk she'll find a way. Long distance is free on a cell phone. She must have friends that she could borrow a cell from. Really a phone call would cost 5 bucks and if her son isn't worth that she must not really want the contact.
I'd let it go, go on with life the way you were and when she's ready to have contact she knows where to find you.
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Single Mom to 1 amazing, strong, intelligent 10 year old
Fparent Certified in 2003
Adoption (of 10 year old) finalized 4/19/6
FS placed 6/25/7 (3 YO now) - TPR done on 1-31-9
(FS's 10 years old step brother was placed at the same time and returned to his own relatives in 5/08)
Placements and respite for ages 2-16
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