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As for your lovely statement at the end, it's entirely unacceptable to talk to people like that. I'm sorry, but I do want a role in my child's life (and have one) and I am thankful that her Mom knows that, respects that, and above all encourages that.
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Thanksgivingmom:
Sorry, it is what it is. When you want to have role like the bdad in this article does, then you DO need to raise your child. Why is it unacceptable? If you want to have liberal visits, be called "the other mother/parent" or have a say in how the child is raised-then raise your child!