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Maybe not an adoption issue
I certainly understand your rant. It is terrible being a part of the sandwich generation - squeezed from both sides. In your case, it might be an adoption issue, but my family experience and my friends has been that usually the girls in the family are the ones called upon to take care of parents - adopted or not. For older parents, the girls are the "care givers". My sister and I both shared the "duties" with my aparents - massive stroke for one and alz. for the other. My brother offered support in the form of "I'll support whatever you want to do". That seems to be the pattern in many families that I know.
I truly feel for you. You can only do what you can do and you have to take care of your family also. Giving up your life is not required of anyone.
Peace.
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