[BrandyHagz]

Well…I never thought I’d be writing this, but here I am.

My adoptive ‘parents’ are getting up there in age…(they are both in their mid/late seventies) and both are facing some fairly extensive medical issues.

I thought I’d been lucky to dodge this bullet when both brothers (my dad is remarried, so I have a step brother too) married and stayed local (I didn’t, I love over 1K miles away)…but I was wrong.

I am being asked – ironically – to take leave from work and go ‘back home’ (don’t even GET me started) and take care of my mother and now…my father as well.

I am close to my step mom – I am ok helping her…but now, both of my adoptive parents have fallen ill and, well, they ‘need’ me.

I have absolutely ZERO desire to go there and help them. I was not afforded a family relationship with them growing up, I don’t feel they have a right to ‘call in favors’ now.

My brother (their biological son) seems to think I owe them. I owe them nothing.

When speaking to my mother, who will be going into surgery next Wednesday, I asked her why my brother or his wife (or some nurses aide he’d pay for…they aren’t poor) couldn’t go over and take care of her? She said they were to ‘busy’ (HELLO!!! I Work…and I have a family…ya know, same as them!) and she hated to put them out…(Grrr are you kidding me?!).

Am I wrong here? These people did NOTHING for me…in fact, just when I thought I’ve gotten to the point that I am ok with forgiving them for the crap they put me through…they pull this ‘you owe us’ crap…and I just can’t deal.

I won’t be going…not to care for them. I am going to sit with my Smom in a week, to help her recover from surgery…but I am not going to disrupt my life, fly out of state and care for these people who only seem to be able to find my phone number when their golden child can’t be bothered to do something for them…(Seriously, my mother called me when I lived in ILLINOIS to fly down and come paint her living room…I’m not kidding!)

Grrr

Can anyone relate?