I am so sorry things are going this way for you.
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And to make matters worse my boyfriend has been so distant and not pleasant lately. He says that he knows he can't understand and that he doesn't. He says he might be mad at me if I give it to my family and I asked how he could say that and he says he isn't sure. He isn't sure how he will feel.
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You know...he has every right to be upset. Not at you. And I don't think it is at you (at least it seems that way to me). But
his rights are being stepped on also here. He has expressed interest in adoption just as you have. From what I am reading the two of you are trying your best to make an intelligent informed decision for the benefit of your child. Yet outside influences press down on you both making it that much harder. As much as you must resent that, I'm sure he does to. He probably sees what this is doing to you and it's eating him up inside.
I feel so bad for you both; so young to face this from others.
I am in agreement with JustPeachy. It doesn't sound like his parents are pushing you (at least you hadn't mentioned that they were so I'm thinking they're not). What, if anything, have they had to say about it? Could they possibly be a source of help or allegiance?
Re your mom's lawyer comment:
I'm sure she loves you and that she only has the best of intentions.......but the road to hell is paved with them. Threatening you with legal action? That is not, in my opinion, a person thinking things through. That is a person reacting to grief. Family situations can get darn ugly. People's needs/wants, heck even their own past pain, can overtake their ability to make rational decisions; can cause them to run over their loved ones without even knowing they're doing it. Anyone who's been party to the funeral of a loved one can attest to this. Not that I'm comparing that to your situation; not at all kiddo.
But in the big life issues such as this; even the wisest of us can lose our way.
It does not seem that your mom is asking herself what could happen in the long run. She's thinking short term. And adoption is anything but.
I honestly don't know what to advise you. Except that you're not whiny. Your scared, confused, feeling alone, grieving and also probably just wanting a resolution, surely just wanting peace.
I am praying that God can sort it all out and that all of you, your family included, can come through this hard time in one piece.
Keep posting Lyricallysound. I can't speak for others of course, but I'm listening.
Much hugs to you today!
Janey