[anniesr]

I would encourage you to seek help from the caseworker immediately. It isn't unusual for boys to punch each other and roughhouse and in some cultures this is viewed as being pretty normal. However, most foster children (even babies) have witnessed some level of violence that your children have not experienced. This isn't a level 'playing field' here and it isn't game. Lots of time, positive interaction, modeling, nurturing and possibly play therapy is needed to help the newcomers understand how to interact with other children in the home and how a healthy family operates. I hope it works.

What I hope does NOT happen is that the brothers are spit into different homes with you keeping the younger one and someone else taking the older one. All too frequently siblings (I've seen this with boys particularly) are placed in a home with other children when the boys have deep needs related to attachment and nuturing. These needs may come out in aggression and the foster parents cannot handle them along with the relatively normal needs of other children in the household. If you decide you cannot parent these boys and your other children then the best you can do is work closely with the caseworker to find a better placement (preferably without other children) where the brothers will not be disrupted again. However, please try not to let them become shuffled through the system similar to what happens with so many other little boys.

Best of luck,
Anne