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We were told the same thing
We were told our kids had a rough beginning in foster care, but they had since done almost a 180 (during their 1 1/2 years in foster care). This was probably true, but 180 wasn't even close to "great." And what they considered "acceptable behavior" was in comparison to their old behavior - much improved but still not great.
The hardest part was that the children were NOT in family situations while in foster care (was more like group homes). So when they joined our family we not only had to deal with the rough edges, but also with them dealing with being part of a family. All sorts of issues came out that hadn't surfaced in foster care because no one tried to love them or be a forever family. Our new 13 year old also had RAD.
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Mary in TX
http://marythemom-mayhem.blogspot.com
http://rad-online.org/
Mom to biokids Ponito(10) and his sister Bob(13)
Sibling pair adoptive placement from NE 11/06
Finally finalized on Kitty(14) on 3/08 - 2 weeks before her 13th birthday!
Finalized on her brother Bear(16) 7/08. He turned 15 the next day.
Adopted children are diagnosed with RAD, bipolar disorder, severe PTSD, ADHD, ODD...
" Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain."
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