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Hi Carolyn, welcome! I am a bmom from a closed adoption so, I too, only know from my experience and I'm not sure I would have been able to "handle" an open adoption. I think it would be great but, at the same time, I'm not emotionally strong enough (or at least I say that from my perspective). I agree, a bank of information, yearly or at whatever interval would have been fantastic rather than years of worrying and torment.
My bson has said he had a great life and, from what he's told me, his parents seem like great people so I am thankful for that as I think that had a lot to do with him searching me out. I "found" him, or at least narrowed it down to 3 people a long time ago but felt that it was inappropriate for me to make contact. Thankfully, nobody in my family has any "health" issues so there wouldn't be much to share in that respect.
I suppose the only problem would be how to "manage" the information. For me, I placed through a social agency and just getting a phone number for their office was a chore at times. Great idea and I do hope more people contemplating closed adoptions think about it. I do know that at my youngest daughter's school there have been a number of young ladies who have decided to parent rather than adopt, etc. I'm wondering if the "closed" aspect of adoption was part of the reason or simply society's position of being more accepting of young mothers.
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