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Yeah, I know it's uncomfortable.......but nothing about adoption is easy!! In our case we had this little form that we filled out. It didn't commit us to anything, but had some guidelines for us. One of them addressed alcohol/drug use (Basically stating that if either problems should arise, contact would stop until things changed)...Also, it stated that the arrangement was between US and if anyone else was to join into our relationship - it would be after a discussion and agreement from the other party. There were some other points too, but it was good that we all had to agree to the conditions - that way we were all on the same page.
Have you thought about having someone help you to discuss this with her?
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Leigh
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