[redbonec]

Our daughter's birthmother has two children that she parents--both of whom are in their teens. They do not know about our daughter, do not know that their mother was pregnant or gave birth two years ago.

Birthmother and I (with daughter) have met twice about halfway between our homes. Then, recently, K and I finally made it to her house to visit. We spent two nights there. I knew her two other children would be there. Visit was great.

Something keeps nagging at me. I feel guilty because when we were there with her children, the fact has not been disclosed about who the visiters (us) are. Eventually, she plans on telling them. I don't know when, but I imagine it will be much later, like maybe when they are out of school. When they know, I wonder if they will be upset that when they saw us they were deceived in some way or feel like they missed out by not knowing. On the other hand, I was relieved when we met them because I hope later when they do know they will be glad they saw her some when she was young, as opposed to only knowing her when she is older.

Should I be feeling guilty or just glad that we can all be together sometimes?