[hkolln]

I have to say something on the "try before buying" statement (Of which I want to make it clear I never agreed with that negative statement but I have an example). Our nieces previous foster parents had no issues with moving any of their previous foster kids to be adopted except for our niece. I asked the CASA worker why that was...why they did not fight for the other kids and her response was "Because they didn't feel it was a "perfect" fit for them but feel your niece is." Well that's all and good...however the point being we were interested family doing what we could to bring her home with us...it wasn't our fault the ICPC took 8 mos...it wasn't their fault either. But as a foster parent you have to understand that in some situations there is responsible, stable family members. Of course there are not for every child and those children deserve to be raised in a loving, stable environment. My thing was with them was why won't they focus their efforts on a child that has NO family and nobody?! I felt very offended that they would fight us in court with an attorney after we were involved for SO long...and doing SO much. It was very insulting to us. Like they were trying to make a point that we were UNFIT to parent our niece and they were better when her biomom couldn't.

Now I don't let that get to me or affect our niece. I wanted her to see a positive transition and also us positively relating...and that was why I continue contact. It's hard and adults can put their emotions aside for the best outcome for the kids..no matter what that is. It's just sad when the adults get so stuck in what is right for THEM and not what is right for the CHILD. I have dealt with it alot lately and it's so hard to stay positive but I do. I want our niece to know we love her and they love her and that's great....there is NOT enough love to go around.

And as for the 6 month rule here in Florida...that too is scary considering ICPC's take forever. I know there is a US statute stating family should take precendence over foster parents however it's not looked at by alot of Judge's. Then the states all determine their own laws regarding that too...and it's written with so much interpretation it's hard to decipher. Our attorney actually felt we may lose the fight for our niece...and I felt bad knowing I had to fight for a relative.

In the end we all need to figure out what is the best thing for the children involved. That to me is the most important thing.