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Have to chime in
We adopted out of birth order, our son was undiagnosed RAD and bipolar. He was not abusive to the children and me, but he physcially attacked my husband (son is 5'9" and 200lbs and has been since age 11!). While he wasn't abusive to myself and the kids, he was physically intimidating and violent and destructive in front of them. Our children are very scared of him - even now that his meds have stabilized him. Allegedly no one knew he was sexually abused (it turned up in paperwork at the school), but the caseworkers claimed they'd never seen it.
The child you are considering has not hit puberty yet. Puberty does some scary things to kids who are well medicated (meds stop working and/or have to be adjusted) and issues come up or new issues develop when all those hormones start raging.
I agree with the others. This will probably not turn out well.
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Mary in TX
http://marythemom-mayhem.blogspot.com
http://rad-online.org/
Mom to biokids Ponito(10) and his sister Bob(13)
Sibling pair adoptive placement from NE 11/06
Finally finalized on Kitty(14) on 3/08 - 2 weeks before her 13th birthday!
Finalized on her brother Bear(16) 7/08. He turned 15 the next day.
Adopted children are diagnosed with RAD, bipolar disorder, severe PTSD, ADHD, ODD...
" Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain."
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