[Linda Lach]

My heart hurts for you, but I agree that you should seek the advice of an experienced adoption attorney to review with him/her your rights at this point, if any. The brutal truth is that you may not have any.

If that is the case, or even if you WILL be allowed to see your son and/or share somewhat in his growing-up years, if only from a distance, the very best thing you can do for your son and your self is to get your head back on track and be the success you set out to be. Letting this "unplanned" event totally untrack your life won't do anyone any good, least of all your son.

Become the man you would want your son to be proud of, because sooner or later you may have the opportunity to have a relationship with him, regardless of what happens now. Dropping out, losing your way, disappointing your parents - all of those are short-term evidence of feeling sorry for yourself because you can't at this moment have what you want. But a mature and honorable man, old enough to be a father, would see that in the long run, he should square his shoulders, hold his head up and move forward. For his parents, himself and his son.

I am an adoption attorney with over 24 years of experience. I have seen this happen a hundred times, and I am telling you, from my heart, that your son will appreciate the man you become, not the immediate mess you might make of things because you are hurting.

My advice is not meant to hurt, but is sent with love.

LL