Denisesmom - hang in there! I'm not sure how to reply/post very well either and I've been doing this for awhile!
To answer your questions - bson is 28, has mom, dad and step-mom and 2 sisters (dad's kids with step mom). I haven't asked him what's going on in so many words - e-mail every month or so asking what's up (he's quick to respond and always cheery) but I'm always initiating contact, making myself available, etc. It's only since bdad and bsiblings have "decided" so to speak not to meet him that he's been distant (not sure if it's related or he's just busy). I'm a little sensitive, I guess.
I have a whole album - his life in pictures so to speak - and he told me there is a place in his life - I have to remember it's a place not "his life". Anyway, I am going through the 5 stages of grief - for sure! Denial that this was going to be as good as it gets, Anger - why doesn't he want to spend more time with me - I'm fun, loving, caring, and I'm in between anger and depression (not sure I'll get to acceptance and I skipped bargaining - who would I bargain with!).
I don't think he feels guilty because I have had no contact with his family and vice versa - he must get the compartmentalizing his life gene from me! I'm hoping to meet his girlfriend in the next year or so but maybe not. I always want what I can't have. Let's stick together and try and work through all of this -there is pain on all sides but, like you, I have trouble making sense of it all. I'm on the road for the next week (posts are limited to between flights) but send me a message any time.
(((HUGS)))