[sak9645]

Lost referrals happen with all countries, even China.

I lost a China referral, when the child was adopted domestically. This was around the time of the big Reorganization of 1996, when slip-ups were more possible. It appears that the province may simply never have informed Beijing of the adoption, while Li Weilin's dossier was awaiting matching. Then, after referral, when Beijing contacted the province to make travel arrangements, it learned that Li Weilin was no longer available.

The loss was exceedingly painful. China issued me another referral immediately, but it took me a while till I could even look at it, and still longer till I felt that the referral was "as good as" the first one. The good news is that the child became my daughter, and that I now realize that she is definitely the child I was meant to have. She is utterly perfect for my family.

With Russia, family members may come forward to claim a child right up until the time of adoption. Russia is rather ambivalent about international adoption, and the authorities in some areas occasionally even try to find relatives and persuade them to adopt so that the child does not wind up going abroad.

With Guatemala, women sometimes decide to parent, after initially relinquishing their children. At least up till now, birthmothers had to give written consent three times prior to the finalization of the adoption, so they had opportunities to reconsider, even after their children had been placed in foster care.

Unfortunately, in some countries, children occasionally pass away or become too ill to be adopted, between the time of referral and the time of travel. This has happened with China, and it has happened with many other countries.

All of these situations may be considered "failed" adoptions. However, in virtually all cases, if the family is willing to proceed, and does not feel too overcome by grief, a new referral will be issued immediately. The Russian failure to issue a new referral is a bit surprising, but my suspicion is that the authorities were a bit negative about international adoption and glad to have an excuse not to let one proceed. I am surprised, however, that your agency didn't simply seek a referral from another region.

There are no international regulations that apply in this sort of situation. In fact, most professionals believe that a child should remain in his/her birth country, if at all possible. Therefore, most would support a decision by a foreign country to go ahead with a domestic adoption if an opportunity that was in the best interests of the child developed before a final decree was signed on an international adoption.

Sharon