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Originally Posted by thanksgivingmom
Not talking about my particular story, but I think I think that there's a difference between the perception that your children will be better off and the reality of if your child will ACTUALLY be better off.
Some women place because their families, agencies, society, etc. convince them that their children will be better off, when in reality that may not be the case. As Belle mentioned some situations expectant Moms may be in truly are temporary. A student for instance that is a semester away from a college degree may feel like she has no options when coached that way by those around her. She perceived that her child would be "better off." The reality is that perhaps she could complete her degree and get a job even with parenting the child. And that the child would not end up with a better life after all - but the end result isn't what dictates placement (of course, as we can't see the end result). It's the perception.
So for me, it's one thing if an expectant Mother says, "I think my child will be better off" than to be later told, "You're child is better off."
I'm afraid that didn't make any sense...if anyone knows what I'm saying feel free to help me out, and if I'm just talking crazy you can ignore it too  |
I think I get what you're saying; and I think I was trying to say the same thing. I agree it is all about perception; and whether the people surrounding the emom (family, friends, agency) are influencing her perceptions one way or the other. That's what I meant when I said she "believes" that her child may be better off. I didn't mean to use one paint brush here to color all birthmom's experiences or situations. There are far too many variables.