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We are in a very similiar situation. When we completed our homestudy we listed which issues we would accept and why or why not. Teeter, who has been with us 9 months now has many of the issues we said would not make him a good match for our family. That said, he IS a good match for our family in his personality, his like and dislikes, etc, but NOT his medical needs and you can't separate his medical needs from him. He is only a foster child at this time, but we were asked to consider permanency. We said yes and then after many months of sickies, we said no. We are still a "no" right now, but we are working hard to help him overcome some of his issues and we hope that either he will be able to stay or he will be that much healthier for when he moves on to his adoptive home.
We tried to make it work for many months and after that many months our reasons for choosing not to be a permanency option are the exact same reasons we put on our homestudy regarding why we would not take children with his medical conditions!
All this said, we love our little boy and we will regardless of whether he's always with us or not.
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