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Lovejoy: Thanks for the information on the ATN. I'll check it out. I've been more than reluctant to seek a support group, but you pose a good point in that it might be a good opportunity to network and find out what's what. Yes, our son if subsidy eligible and even receives services from a post adoptive service agency, but they've threatened to cut us off if we're not interested in reunification. I see no reason to tip my hand yet and I don't feel guilty about it either. The system has no problem lying to us, so I'll gladly return the favor. A long-term placement would work wonders for our family.
We are good parents and I don't feel responsible for our son's problems, as they were his long before we met. My only regret is that we couldn't cause change in his life. I believe we all have choices that affect our lives. I'm grateful my other kids have chosen a better life for themselves. I know they had to feel comfortable in their environment in order to feel comfortable making those changes. The fact that they have come so far has convinced me that it is not us, but our son who's chosen to pursue this path of self-destruction. He's nine years old and has the emotional age of a 3 year old (his age at removal from his biological family).
You asked about a placement recommendation from the hospital. They quadrupled his medicine, told us to continue with therapy and are requiring us to set him an appointment with an art therapist, but no recommendation for out of home placement at this time. Our son is a master of manipulation and has been a perfect angel while he’s been the hospital. Thank God you understand my frustration here. I resent that Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde has these people eating out of his hand. It doesn’t help his cause as far as helping us get him the help he needs and our getting a recommendation for placement, which we need to help our family feel safe. I’m a cop. I deal with bad guys for a living and yet I’m afraid of my nine-year-old son. Doesn’t that count for something?
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