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Old 05-15-2008, 09:09 PM
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kakuehl kakuehl is offline
Birth mom in reunion

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It's been interesting to follow this thread. The words we use are so emotion-laden. As I have stated before, D has one mom and that's the woman who raised him. What complicates it for me is that he is my firstborn child. Adoption didn't change that, nor did it stop me loving him. He calls me by my first name (as I call him by his, lol). We have a lot in common because of our genetics. (As I have said a number of times, "reunion" with D has given me a whole new perspective on the Nature/Nuture argument.) On the other hand, he is comfortable sharing things with me that he isn't with his mom, just because I'm not the one who raised him.

Nicole, you are very right. You don't know how you will feel. I think I would have been ok just knowing D was alive and well if all he wanted was medical history and family background. In some ways, being in reunion brings up emotions that I would not have to wrestle with if we didn't have a relationship. Reunion, like life is a journey. Relationships shift and grow (or not). I can only hope if you are ever in contact with the woman who gave birth to you, that it will be as enriching to your life as getting to know D has been to mine.
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Kathy,

Forum moderator for birthfamily healing, recovery, success
and
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Birth mom to D (10/4/72)
Mom to J(7/6/76) and S (7/26/78)



"Weeping may linger for the night,
but joy comes with the morning." (Psalm 30:5)

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