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While I agree that there could be underlying issues, I also wouldn't jump to that conclusion. If you lined up 100 moms with both bio, adopted, foster and all other type of children - 99 of them would say that they went through this at one age on another. I know so many people here hate the "this is normal"...but it can be and is for most kids. I was, perhaps, the one who gave Tweetymom the idea about the privilege grab bag. We use that with our 9,10 and 11 year old kids. It's for any and all infractions. They must "tear a privilege" - I have ours on a tear sheet. It sure does work around here. I do find I have to continue changing what it on the sheet or they get "used" to some loss of privileges. Anyway...the other thought I had right away was that he should lose the right to play alone. If you have things to do, he should be your right hand man...always within an arms reach. It will slow your day down some - but put the onus on him. It's his job to stay close to you. You should make him understand that he could earn back the right to play alone (or out of eyesight)...but for now, you'd like to have him with you. And, I totally agree that he should be and is able to clean up his own messes. The clean up may not be to your standards, but make a standard that is clean and achievable for a almost 5 year old. He can't go to kindergarten and expect to behave this way...it will be a long year for all of you!
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