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Positive Reinforcement
Have you thought about positive reinforcement? I am reading a book called Don't Shoot the Dog, and it's about using positive reinforcement in not only dog training, but in all areas of human interaction. I am trying to incorporate this into my family life.
OTOH, I must admit, my son [age 11] is testing the boundaries. He wants the world to operate on his timetable and he just shuts down and refuses to do things he doesn't want to do. The only thing I've found that really works is for me to threaten time out on his knees - a 20 minute time out, kneeling, is not fun. I also threaten to take away Gameboys, etc. He's lost Gameboy privileges before.
One behaviorist I know of advocates taking all toys and everything fun away from a child and making them "earn" them back with good behavior.
Good luck -
Dee
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