Zxczxcasdasd
Quote:
|
I'm sorry you felt you had to back off because of his family issues.
|
He was relinquished in the very closed era.. and his aparents are older than me..
Not much learning about the human condition back then..
He does not speak of them.. I have not seen any pictures of them..
I have no problem with this.. tho… I am okay with what is happening in my reunion.. and am one of the ones making it so…
Quote:
|
I don't think that adoptees owe their parents not searching or building relationships with their birth families, not for a minute! But I do not understand why aparents' feelings and struggle with it are so often met with scorn, dismissal, or advice to just ignore or freeze them out...rather than with the compassion and grace we all want when we're confused and hurting, especially from immediate family members.
|
When I reunited I was lucky enough to have a friend (on line friend) that was dealing with reunion.. of her step daughter.. (she was not the original amom)..
But this woman was able to share her fears with me.. and I was able to share my fears with her..
We helped each other..
Keeping an open mind.. and understanding that everyone involved in this is going to have their world shaken up..
So complicated these reunions .. And I think taking ones time works..
I keep posting a Reunion Socialization letter.. by anonymous..
The last lines in this letter is..
“You have the rest of your life to sort this.”
Quote:
I hope that things with your son's family improve so that it's not an impediment to your relationship. I like happy endings.
|
I am an impediment.. We do not have the money to travel across the country to go and visit.. I do not feel comfortable getting phone calls.. and he does not do email..
But his sending pictures and me knowing all is well and if something bad does happen he will call.. is enough..
Jackie