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Originally Posted by DebsW
Thanks everyone for sharing. I have been thinking about this for a while now.
Bmom and I are very close. She is such a good person. She has welcomed me with open arms, as has most everyone in my two birth families.
I have many struggles with Aparents and the way I was raised. Adad has passed away and Amom is difficult regarding bfamily.
In the two years that we have been in reunion I have shared some things, not all at once but it is obvious that there was a lot of emotional abuse.
Bmom has just recently told me that she does not want to know any more. I have not shared much with her anyway and I have sanitized a lot of it.
I want to talk to her about how she feels. She is not one to dwell on her feelings as she feels she does not want to burden anyone with them. She wants peace and harmony which I understand but I really feel she would get a lot out of releasing some of her emotions.
I have assured her that I am not going anywhere, she can feel angry, sad, whatever and my feelings for her will not change.
I wonder if I should sit her down and just try to have a heart to heart. I have attempted this in the past but she keeps the conversations on a light path, nothing to serious.
Anyone have any suggestions of what I can say to help her open up, or should I just let it go and always wonder how she feels?
DSW
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you are fortunate about your birmom i mean. i am a birthmom and my daughter who is 48 were in reunion . she had to be treated with kid gloves and was very protective of adomom even thou i think she was an alcoholic. this has ruined our relationship. she kept her birdad and 4 bros. a secret. this is not for a good relationship. your birthmom has a lot of emotion and it problably hurts her to know about your past. there is a lot of guilt even if things were good. thanks