MY HUSBAND AND I ARE SO SO SO CONFUSED WITH OUR NEW FOSTER ADOPT CHILD. WE RECIEVED OUR 9 YEAR OLD SEPT. 19, SHE MOVED IN WITH US AND WE SIGNED PAPERS TO BECOME LEGAL GUARDIANS TILL THE ADOPTION WAS FINAL. WE FLEW FROM HAWAII TO MEET OUR DAUGHTER , SHE WAS HAPPY, FULL OF LIFE AND VERY LOVING. WE BROUGHT HER TO OUR HOUSE..NO OTHER KIDS AND SHE WENT MAD!
WE HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING WITH HER, SHE DOESN'T KNOW WHY SHE COMES HOME FROM SCHOOL.LITERALLY COVERED FROM HEAD TO TOE IN ORANGE DIRT. SHE CAME TO US WITH NO CLOTHES, ALL HER CLOTHES ARE BRANDNEW,BUT AFTER WEARING SOME OF THEM, THEY HAD TO BE TRASHED BECAUSE SHE LITERALLY PLACED HOLES IN THEM.WALKING ON THE BACK OF HER SHOES,GETTING ON HER HANDS AND KNEES AND RUBBING HOLES IN THE KNEES! SHE TALKS BACK.LIKES NEGATIVE ATTENTION. WILL BEAT THE WALLS IN HER ROOM IF YOU PUT HER INTO TIME OUT IN HER ROOM, WILL DROP VCR TAPES ON THE FLOOR OVER AND OVER AGAIN TO GET YOU TO COME INTO THE ROOM, WILL SCREAM, STILL WETS THE BED, SCREAMS AND MOANS FOR HOURS WITH NO TEARS, SAYS SHE HATES HERSELF, WHEN SHE GETS INTO TROUBLE..SAYS MY HUSBAND AND I DON'T LOVE HER BECAUSE WE PUNISH HER AND TAKE AWAY ALL HER THINGS OUT OF THE ROOM, WHEN SHE GETS UNCONTROLLABLE, TELLS EVERYONE WE BEAT HER, TELLS ME ABOUT ALL HER FRIENDS ANDHOW THEY GET TO DO THINGS, LIKE RIDE THEIR BIKES, AND SHE CAN'T.SO WE ARE MEAN AND RUDE AND DON'T LIKE US AND WE DON'T LOVE HER. GETS MADE WHEN YOU TELL HER TO BRUSH HER TEETH, OR TAKE WET SHEETS OFF THE BED, WILL WINE LIKE A BABY FOR HOURS IN HER ROOM, UNTIL SHE GETS HUNGRY, AND THEN WILL SAY WE ARE STARVING HER BECAUSE WE WON'T LET HER EAT. I TELL HER IF SHE WANTS TO EAT, WE WILL FEED HER, BUT ONLY WHEN SHE DO WHAT WE TELL HER INTIAL TO DO AND TO STOP CRYING. YOU CAN'T EAT IF YOU ARE CRYING. SHE COMES OUT AFTER A HALF DAY OF EPISODES LIKE THIS, ATLEAST THREE TIMES A WEEK. WHEN SHE IS GOOD, SHE DOESN'T SHOW LOVE OR BOND OR ATTACHEMENT. MY DAUGHTER EVERY NOW AND THEN WILL HUG YOU, OR WANT YOU TO HUG HER..FORCIBLY I TAKE HUGS. MY DAUGHTER IS VERY BRIGHT AND VERY BEAUTIFUL AND SO SO SMART. SHE ACTS OUT AT SCHOOL AND THE TEACHER IGNORE HER AND USUALLY THAT WORKS..I REALLY WANT HER TO ENJOY USE AND WE ENJOY HER, AND NOT BE SO UPTIGHT. I AM OPEN TO ANY SUGGESTIONS AT THIS TIME. ANY KIND OF ENLIGHTMENT WILL HELP US. WE LOVE HER AND WILL NOT SEND HER BACK, AND WE WANT HER TO KNOW THAT, BUT IT GETS HARD AND I DON'T KNOW HOW TO GET HER TO UNDERSTAND WE AS THE PARENTS ARE HERE TO HELP HER, LOVE HER AND BE HERE FOR HER NO MATTER WHAT. MY HUSBAND AND I REALLY NEED HELP! WE NEED WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT. EVERYONE TELLS US SHE NEEDS A GOOD SPANKING!
THANKS FOR WHO EVER READS THIS AND LISTENS, TO ME..I JUST NEED TO VENT!
P.S. WE HAD A FOSTER BABY BEFORE BUT NEVER AN OLDER CHILD AND CERTAINTLY NOT ONE WITH THIS KINDA OF ISSUES...
THANK GATEY IN HAWAII...