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1.) How are you connected to adoption?
I am an Adoptive mom of a beautiful 17 month old daughter
2.) Do you do anything special to celebrate national adoption month (Nov.)?
I am plannign ot send her Bmom a gift, not sure what yet
3.) When growing up, did you know anyone connected to adoption?
2 of my 4 grandparents were adopted- 1 by the milk man, kinda funny
4.) If you can remember, when did you first learn about adoption as a child?
l think I was about 10, nad ?ed why I had 2 great granmothers from the same grandmom
5.) In high school, did you know anyone who had a baby and placed?
No
4.) Anyone in your family, other than you, connected to adoption?
my husbands cousin they do fost/adopt but are haivng trouble finalizing
5.) When adopting or placing your child, did anyone say rude/ignorant comments? What were they? If you are an adoptee, have you received rude comments?
We are very lucky in that most people are supportive. We heard dumb comments about getting pregnant and having"our own" child once we adopted
6.) If you had to do things all over again with either placing your child or adopting, what things - small or large - would you do differently?
I would not have stopped at the family and let them throw a party on the way home from the hosptial, but spend some alone time with her first
7.) How has placing/adopting your child changed you?
I feel I am a better person, I look a the world through my daughters eyes and slow down a little-- I also try not ot judge what I don't understand
8.) How has your views changed on adoption since placing or adopting your child?
I know a lot more know. I remember meeting some Bmoms at the agency and learning they aren't scary people, they are loving wonderful poeple that deserve our utmost respect
9.) Do you have a closed, semi-open, or fully open adoption?
I guess you'd call it's semi-open- we send pic and letters through the agency a nd if Bmom wanted she could send back that way- I did give her my cell phone number in a letter but she hasn't used it
10.) If you have an open adoption, what has been the toughest thing about it?
11.) If you have an open adoption, what has been the best thing about it?
12.) What has been the greatest lesson you've learned about the other side of the triad? (example: If you're an aMom, what have you learned about bMoms)
They aren't scary. I remember the first tiem I hear she would pick us, it scared me. Then I met a few and found they were scared of us- that shocked me.
13.) Name your biggest pet peeve in the adoption world?
Outsiders who don't understand and give there 2 cents anyway
14.) If you are a birthmom, would you ever consider adopting a child? Why or why not?
15.) Are you satisfied with the adoption agency you placed/adopted through? Why or why not?
Yes and no- our social worker left right after our placement- we loved her, when we had a Bmom change her mind earlier, the first social woker cleared her whole day and sat and talk us through it. The new SW doesn't even return my calls
16.) Do you currently attend a support group or receive any counselling through an agency?
NO
17.) Name a disappointment you've felt after placing/adopting:
i really don't think I have any, I can't imagine having a different child in my life
18.) Name a misconception people (family,strangers) have about you being an adoptive mom or birthmom or adoptee:
That I am not a "real" mom- I hate that label, I think it is wrong and unfair to all of us or that I don't/can't love her like I would a Bio child
19.) What books, magazines, websites, articles, links, etc ...have you found most helpful after placing/adopting?
Adoption Today- the articles by you Skye
this forum
20.) Write anything you wish here:
Thank you Skye for bringing up these questions and for all your writings.
Michelle
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