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joskimo,
I also raised my niece and nephews (for the same reasons) so I know how hard this must be for you. You know the boys have been failed once so you try even harder to provide a good life, but you certainly can't do it a the expense of another child. I doubt your decision would be any different even if it wasn't your child he harmed.
Has he given the counsler any explanation for his actions. He had to know your daughter would tell you. You said he was previously a victim himself, when, and what about his younger brother? Are you sure it was a long time ago or is it possible he's recently been abused? I say that in light of a terrible case now exposed where I live. Young boys (ages 11 -14) were getting molested by a teacher that had been a very respected and active community member. The story came out when one of the boys acted out on his own younger brother. It was interpreted as a cry for help without having to "tell" as he had been threatened not to do.
I am so sad for your daughter. After so long she must feel like the boys were more brothers than cousins. You have my deepest sympathy for your trials and best wishes for your daughter's recovery.
Trish
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