This message was originally posted by
samueljr4577.
Bacrone and Gwen,
First I would like to thank Bacrone for the link to the site. It gave me a lot of knowledge of what my foster son may be going through.
Gwen your kind words are always encourageing and helps me understand myself a little better.
I have to say that being a foster parent is exhausting and hard work. I find myself tired and stressed out, that sometimes I don't have time for myself anymore.
My heart goes out to my sons although I wonder if I am doing a good job for them.
I wonder how I have gotton through these past two months as a foster dad. I have to admit I did not realize how important my job as a foster parent is for my boys.
When I first did this I was worried what people would think becuase of the different color of my skin is compared to my children. I have learned that my children are more important that what people may think. I love my kids and I will always no matter how long they will be with me.
I have to fight for them because right now the system is not doing their job to help them. My 7 year old is suffering because no one took the chance to allow him to heal. He needs the time to adjust and I want to be the dad to help him.
My 11 year old needed time to accept that he may be adopted. He was moved from home to home since he was 5 because no one took the time to really listen to him. He was afraid to be adopted because he felt he was betraying his birth mother. With my help he will transistion into an adopted family because I will be with him every step of the way.
I became a teacher because I wanted to dedicate my life to helping children. Teaching is part of my job but being a foster parent is my true calling.
I don't know how much longer both of my boys will be with me. It could be one week or maybe three months. I will not know until their social worker decides.
I only know one thing for certain I am not the same man I use to be two months ago when my first son came into my home. I am lucky because they have been my teachers and taught me to love unconditionally no matter what the cost.
I will keep everyone posted on my journey. If I do not respond for awhile it is because I am being a dad and can not get to my computer. Thanks again in advanced.