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I agree that no one should feel obligated to adopt a child.
However, foster parents need to be sure that they don't influence a child to "settle" on being a foster child if they have the opportunity to be adopted. I have seen too many foster parents fight against a child leaving their home to be adopted saying the child is stable, a member of the family, doesn't want to leave, etc. Only to have those same children removed a few years later when they become teenagers because they are harder to parent.
I would question why the worker has such a negative view of the boys prospects for an adoptive home. How can you help them reach that goal? Do they need current pictures and information? Has the message that they need an adoptive family been passed on to every member of the team that supports them, teachers, doctors, therapists, clergy, etc.? I would make sure the worker was regularly reminded that finding an adoptive home is a priority for the boys.
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