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Hi Clara,
Thanks for saying hi and stopping by my journal.
Well, we've made our decision and we are not going to proceed with the adoption. This was the hardest thing that I've ever had to do and my husband is feeling the same way.
It's all kind of surreal. Last week I was painting a bedroom and buying toys and this week I'm just kind of existing. Now that we've made our decision I do feel that we are making the right one. We've talked about everything and we feel this is the best for her and us.
It's just so hard knowing that she was so close to having a home and now she doesn't. I can't help but feeling like I'm cheating her out of something. But you know what, we're the ones that are losing, we aren't going to know this beautiful little girl.
I have to tell myself that we are giving a gift to someone else that will welcome her into their home with open arms.
I hope I'm making sense and not just rambling on.
Well, have a good day everyone. I have a meeting with my social worker today and I'll let you all know how it went later on.
Stacy
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