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I agree with everyone, and am also incensed by the "saint" comments - but I think it just goes with the territory. My son has been with me for 3 1/2 years now, and is 12 years old. We had initial adjustment struggles, but now are just dealing with what I consider normal "I'm a teenager and you can't tell *me* what to do!" issues. However, if I share such issues with some folks, including those whose kids are now young adults and have been through such issues, instead of getting "oh, I remember that, it was really a pain" (and perhaps "this is one way we got through it") I get the sympathetic look and the "you're really a saint - he's so lucky." At that point the conversation ends rather quickly with my saying that we're *both* lucky - and I resolve to put them on the list of people that I can only be superficial with. It is infuriating, and I keep wishing for the perfect comment so that they'd once and for all "get it" - but I haven't come up with anything yet.
It's hard not to get discouraged, and some friendships have cooled due to their not being willing or able to see past the problems and/or sainthood - but others have stepped forward to fill the gaps (some of them unlooked-for and pleasant surprises!)
Congratulations, Kalynn, on adding to your family!
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