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After 48 years of searching in my heart.......I finally found the courage to actually begin the search for my birthmother. Little did I know that in 45 minutes I would have my birthfamily's information in front of me on the computer screen.......(man.... if I had thought it would have been THAT easy I probably would have done it SOONER) I had known my original birth name all my life and also knew that my bmom's dad had died at the age of 44 before I was born.....SO.....one day I decided to plug my last name into a death index at ancestry.com and then scroll down until I found someone who matched this information.......BINGO.. didn't have to look long. There in front of me was his name.... and when I clicked on it for his family.......there was MY original name at birth as one of his children.....it was a bit of an unusual name so I knew that I had found who I had been searching for all my life. (I had been named after my bmom's baby sister) It took a few more months for me to get the courage to contact my bmom.....but on my 48th birthday I had a good friend who is a reunited bmom make the first call to MY bmom... (just in case she didn't want contact......I didn't want to be the one to hear that).......BUT it was the opposite.....my bmom was grieving that day as she said she had that day EVERY year.....and we had an unbelievable conversation that lasted over an hour. It took a couple more months for her to be able to handle meeting me but it's been one WONDERFUL ride since then. Not only did I find a loving mother and her great husband..but I also gained a wonderful sister and 3 fantastic brothers who have all welcomed me with open arms. I joined 24 cousins, 3 aunts and 2 uncles... a VERY large and loving family that I am thrilled to be part of... this past weekend I was with 2 brothers and my sister at a high school reunion where a few heads were turned as I was introduced as their "sister"......their friend's reactions resembled deer in headlights! I have met my birthfather who married the second girl that he got pregnant....(nice guy huh?)... no relationship or any contact after that first meeting has occured. I have 3 more brothers and 2 more sisters from him that don't even want to meet me......after hearing some of the comments that have been made about me (a cousin from bmom's side married a brother from bdad.....so I have insider information...hehe) I'm not sure that I would EVER want to meet them either......I DO have one regret in this all........not searching sooner....but as my baby brother put it......it was the right time... and was what we ALL needed..... With opposite reactions from my bmom and bdad......I have felt both love and rejection.... but even the rejection is better than not knowing at all for me..... Good luck in your searches and reunions.......sal
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