I personally don't think that you can assume anything when it comes to another persons feelings or beliefs. There are many variables in every situation but expecially in such a personal and emotional one as placing a child for adoption.
Everyone reacts differently and the way adoption was handled years ago also has an affect on how your bmother may be feeling. As an adoptee, the attitudes of the past affected how I viewed things. I felt that I would be an intrusion to bparents. I have been critisized by some on the forum, even called cold and callous, for waiting till now to search, but as "CaGrandma" says
"I do not think they were told they must not look,. reunion was never a possibilty to be dreamed of in those days,.". It was the same for adoptees that came of age with a different mentality of society. I was never told "not to look" but reunion was not the common occurence that it is now. Why would anyone tell you NOT to do something that simply was NOT done? The internet has certainly been a big help to many in recent years, but don't forget that not everyone is online.
Go with your heart and best of luck! By the way, I noticed that when you started your thread your first post spelled out "Birth Mom". In later posts the abbreviation "birthmom" is being used. After reading many posts by bmothers (a thread even addressed this topic) I am very aware how offensive many find that abbreviation as it is commonly used for a bodily function. If you don't want to spell it out, bmom, bmother and bio-mom are commonly used and much more pleasant. Just a friendly "heads up" - Thanks!
