[mrbeansmom]

I am the adoptive parent of four children on the autistic spectrum (two high functioning, two low functioning). Ours were adopted by us before we knew they had autism. We are currently home studied and waiting for another child to adopt, but we have specifically requested NO children with autism. Contrary to the thought that "autistic children are intelligent", statistics show that over 70% of children with autism are mentally retarded. There are some who have talent in certain areas (savants), but they are NOT the norm. Many of the higher functioning children (Aspergers) are bright and do well academically, but the lower functioning, classic autistic, children do not. While there are families who will adopt these children there are few people waiting in line to do so. Placing privately will offer them the choice of hand picking the family to raise their son. At his age, he would simply languish in the system if they turned him over to foster care, I'm afraid.

I love my four with all my heart, but I will not lie and make it sound like it's been some magical journey. They are HARD work and their behaviors have caused us to become prisoners in our own home. Your friend would not even be considering such an option of giving her son up for adoption if raising him were not the work it most likely is. That would be an absolutely heart wrenching decision and he must be quite challenging for her to even entertain the thought. Is there no one to help her? Are there no supports in place to help them with him?

Juliana