[mrsred]

I am sorry that so many posts seem sad and negative. For most of us, when things are going really well we don't post... it is when we are overwhelmed that we spill or guts here. This is a safe environment where there are other people that can really understand what we are talking about. My real life friends are great, but they don't really get it.
So, here, I will tell you my happy stuff. We have a 12 year old bio son. Our first placement was a 5 year old boy in 2004 that we adopted one year later. He has a lot of special needs (we actually suspect he has asperger's but havent' been able to get a dx), but we can't imagine our lives without him. Our next placement was a 9 1/2 yr old girl in February 2006 that we adopted 10 months later. She is also a very challenging child, but our daughter. The three of them are very much bonded to each other. We have been blessed, because while we do have some issues, they are not insurmountable. Overall, I would say that ours is a success story.
There is also a matter of knowing your limits. Since you already have one special needs child you would want to make sure the needs of your adopted child(ren) don't conflict with his. As you may see from our signature, we also have a foster daughter. We had planned to adopt her, but the combination of her special needs and our 8 year old son's just don't work. It is not in the best interest of either of them to continue.
Bottom line is, don't let the negative posts scare you off, but do learn from them. Learn what to look for, learn what problems you can handle and what would be too much.
Good luck!