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Old 05-03-2008, 03:38 PM
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kakuehl kakuehl is offline
Birth mom in reunion

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Ah guilt, we mothers are good at feeling it! My mother used to drive me nuts, because anything I did that was wrong (or that she disagreed with) she would blame herself for. (If she'd been a better mother I won't have _______ - fill in the blank.) I do it with my children too, placed and raised although I'm not as bad as mom. The two I raised are very good at telling me it was their choice/s not my lack of parenting... Adoption, of course, brings its own baggage. Your bmom will need to figure out how to let go of her own guilt. Like everything else I find it comes and goes. Mentally, I know the guilt is unrealistic and unnecessary; emotionally it's a different story.

Hang in there. You are at the beginning of the relationship. It is a journey of discovery!
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Kathy,

Forum moderator for birthfamily healing, recovery, success
and
Birthparent support

Birth mom to D (10/4/72)
Mom to J(7/6/76) and S (7/26/78)



"Weeping may linger for the night,
but joy comes with the morning." (Psalm 30:5)

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