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I am not going to say don't feel guilty, I would, I have for what I have told my bmom. And I am ok with that. We have been reunited for 8 months, we have a wonderful reunion. I have told her things that maybe I shouldn't have or so I thought (or obsessed about). Most Bmoms really do want to hear the good and the bad, but they may not be ready to deal with it all well. You can not spend your whole life censoring what you say, way too hard, plus if your bmom really wants to get to know you she has to hear about it all.
You are going to say and do the wrong things probably a lot with your bmom, I do, and trust me she will say the wrong things too. We are human and going through one of the most traumatic (IMHO) things one can go through, reunion.
Work it out with your bmom, ask questions, be honest but know this, no matter what you do she will feel guilty, sorry nature of the relationship. Should she?? NO!!! But she will, mine does, I hate that she does but I CAN NOT change it. Maybe it will diminish over time, maybe it won't, but no matter what we'll work through it, she is my mother.
You'll be fine, you have a lot to handle, one day at a time, and breathe! Like someone else keeps telling me, this is a journey. (a long one)
Be sad, be angry, be all of it, feel it all but most of all enjoy your reunion and hopefully really feel some of the happiness of it all.
Good Luck! Keep us posted.
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