I think, personally, we need to remember that just because someone's experience differs from yours and they share that experience - that doesn't mean that they are trying to invalidate your experience or that your experience is wrong.
I find that I am often told I am 'for open adoption at all costs' and that couldn't be further from the truth. My personal experience is the only measuring stick by which I can measure. I often share, based on my experiences and doing so is not an attempt to belittle others or render their experience void or less than my own.
I think too, we tend think people who share their opinions and experiences are attempting to ‘convert’ us or change our method of thinking.
I try very hard not to allow others to make me feel bad, angry, upset, hurt (insert emotion here) by sharing an opinion that differs from mine.
I am not here to coddle or give unbridled support to others, whom don’t share my views. I am here to share my experiences and thoughts on the topic of adoption – and I know, regardless of how I feel about my experience, there will always be those who disagree with me.
I think, instinctively, we feel threatened by others who have views that differ from our own. In our circle of friends, we chose to associate with people who tend to share our same interest, similar passions and similar views. That isn’t the way it is on a forum. You open yourself up to opinions and thoughts from all sides – and you’ve got no control over who replies or responds to your ‘laying your heart on the line’.
I will be the first to admit that, at times, we could all use a lesson in democracy when it comes to addressing things that push our buttons…or correcting a perceived wrong. I am not omitted from that group of people either. There are times when I reply emotionally to topics which are very close to my heart. Most people know what those are…
I don’t know. I think the biggest way we can educate is by remembering that people here (aside from a few
) aren’t here to hurt you, push your buttons, irritate and enrage you – if you feel you NEED to respond to something that is an emotional trigger – do so with kindness and respect.