[paman8]

I agree that there are many times when adoption isn't the best choice or at very least a very painful choice. Things don't ALWAYS go the way you hoped or planned for...and you may regret it later. Being educated is important in making a good decision. Adoption is a good decision for thousands of women every year.

On the other hand, parenting doesn't always go perfectly, either. There are many wonderful ladies that after a few months or years find out that parenting is harder than they thought, finances never panned out, and that they can't provide the home for their children they planned on, and decide that they need to place at that point...and sometimes find themselves in a situation where they have no choice.

When you find yourself with an unplanned pregnancy, especially if you are not in a stable, committed marriage, or have tons of family support, there are NO EASY ANSWERS. Both choices are hard. It's impossible to say for sure that things would have been better if....

We have a great young lady that matched with us and decided to parent. We are still close and she is bringing the baby for a visit this month. She loves her child, is keeping her child, and is a great mom. But it's not easy! Easier than placing? Maybe. No one will ever know because it's different for everyone.

My sister placed, and hard as it is, it was better for her and her child. She wasn't ready to parent. She has a 4 year old little girl now, married and she's still unsure enough about her "parenting" that she doesn't want another child.

I'm sorry that you now regret your decision. You have a lot of good points about the circumstances of making that decision.

Pam