got the news...
I got a certified letter from Connecticut where by Bfather is from... but it wasn't from him... it was from his attorney's office... the attorney that handled his estate... he died a few years ago from lung cancer... he smoked for over 40 years... THIS SUCKS!!!
I hate these emotions even more than the ones regarding waiting for a response letter... foreclosure of a dream... my wife lost her father a few months ago... now, I have no chance of talking or reuniting with mine... all because of some bull**** family secrets... don't tell John because he might get upset... what bull****... I'm even more upset having lost the chance to ever get to know 50% of who I am biologically... this sucks...
I had a dream a couple nights ago that my world was torn apart and was being rebuilt but I didn't like how that was going... now I understand what that means... while I never had or ever will have my b-father in my life... I do have faith in my heavenly father... that HE will make some sort of sense out of this awful mess... that He has some sort of purpose in all this... thanks for all your support and prayers...
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