[Oceans]

I am now sitting here wondering if I owe anything at all to the amom,You owe her exactly what you owe everyone else walking on this planet which is initial respect. That said, if someone calls you a "baby maker" would you keep them in your life? My guess is no. So my opinion is that you should no longer have convos with the amom until she is willing to treat you with respect and dignity that YOU deserve.

although my daughter does not want us to have any type of relationship with eachother. Still, though she is a child, is she really capable of making that choice?She is 18 (almost) and my opinion is that yes, she has that choice and it should be respected.

Also, I know that the amom has been very reserved with my daughter since our visit and her little blow up, and that is hard for me to hear from her when I am almost 840 miles apart. I have since made a very conscous choice to not ask about how things are going with her and the amom, and I am not sure that is the right thing either.I think it's the right thing to do. It's their issue. They will work through it...

I want my daughter to know that she can talk to me, but how can I listen to such garbage and not give my advice/opinion?It's tough but you can't take sides just say something along the lines of I'm sorry this is happening. Nothing specific. They will "make up" this is a bump in their relationship.

I guess I am just looking for some help and advice, I love my daughter and am kind of at a loss as to how to be there for her without destroying my relationship with her over things I might say about her amom in the heat of the moment. You know it's hard but you have to remember that you are the adult. I think you are right on when you say that if you take sides it will end up hurting your relationship. It's OK for you to be upset but don't let it show. Maybe re-focus the conversations away from amom and talk more about her 1/2 sibs or school or something else...

((( Hugs ))) Hope this gets better!