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Old 04-21-2008, 10:30 PM
Oceans Oceans is offline
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Nichole - I know you are getting a ton of input on your situation lately so I have kept quiet. I hope you know I am only trying to help.

When I placed my son 26 years ago, I was encouraged not to name the bdad by the lawyer (even tho bdad knew). I did name him b/c I never wanted my son to think I didn't know who his bdad was but I could have easily gone the other way. Honestly, the decision to name him was selfish on my part.

In a recent placement I was involved with the bdad would not sign and this is an OA. He knew he couldn't raise the baby but he had his personal reasons (I wont even speculate b/c I'm not sure what they were). This bdad also loves his child and is involved in the OA.

Just know that because your bdad wasn't mentioned, doesn't mean he didn't know, he didn't care or he is unknown. There were so many half truths back then it's hard to know what's true and what isn't sometimes....

It's so unfair to you
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Oceans

"You are never given a wish without being given the power to make it true. You may have to work for it, however."
Illusions - The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah by Richard Bach

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