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Wow, they should at least take the child to therapy so he can deal with it. Most kids need to know that it is not their fault.
What I am not understanding is where you said he had been touched by a 9 year old before. Was that when he was with you before he was placed with your brother and SIL? If that was the case why would SIL be angry with you for saying something? She should be grateful that you took notice and it wasn't some predator that took advantage of your son. Also, if it happened before he was placed with them, wouldn't that be enough to explain his behavior to the investigators, I mean it DID happen so that is part of his past, it isn't like anyone is hiding anything, at least they are aware of it and should be helping him. If anything failure to help your son would be something to prevent them from adopting again I would think if it ever came up in a homestudy.
I mean I woudn't want to place a child with parents that already had a child with SA in his past and refused to help him. KWIM?
EZ
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