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She is in stopped time..
The Mistress’s Daughter by A.M. Holms..
Page 32
The birthmom and the relinquished daughter (A.M. Holms) have connected.. they talk on the phone..
She interrupts herself. “Do you think, one day, we might have a portrait painted of the two of us?” Her request seems to come from another world, another life. What would she do with a portrait? Hang it over the fireplace in Atlantic City? Send it to my father for Christmas? She is in stopped time, filled with fantasies of what might have been. After thirty-one years, she has returned to reclaim the life she never had.
“I have to go, I’m late for dinner,” I say.
“Okay,” she says. “but before you go out, put on your cashmere sweater so you don’t get chilly.”
I don’t have a cashmere sweater.
I just read a thread about how the birthdaughter is upset and the mother is trying to say something that is not getting across (or what she is saying is the wrong thing to say) and the birthdaughter is trying to clarify.. and all is not well..
I.. me.. a birthmom.. was in ‘stopped time’ for a long time.. It's still easy for me to fall into that place.. another life another world.. another time..
The birthmom in AM Holms book (her birthmom) is/was kind of lost.. a space cadet some would say..
I am a space cadet.. I will start sentences and then get lost in the telling.. and my family will understands and say to each other she is doing it again..
Its what Holms addresses here to me..that being when great trauma happens to some of us.. some of us get kind of lost..
Sooooo can anyone else share on lost time?
Jackie
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