[catm]

August, we had a 16 yr. old girl placed with us who turned 17 in Dec. We are to be finalized Wednesday. I agree with your feelings of "who will they spend the holidays with?". I would also have concern about bringing a male into your family as "most" kids who are removed due to abuse or neglect have had some exposure to sexual abuse. we lucked out with our girl. She was only in a group home due to her mother's illnesses and therefore inability to care for her. We wanted an older child because we knew our lifestyle wouldn't mold to that of a younger child who needed constant attention. Our girl has a job and can be left alone for short periods of time. They also come with a "what you can expect manual" from the group/foster home, which, to me, beats the crap shoot you get from a bio child. However, most of my friends tried to warn me about not having enough time with them to have our good values rub off on the teen. My comment is, give me any child up to the age of 21 and tell me all the problems they have had. If you knew of all the heartache or problems, would you do it again? Of course, when it's "your own" they always say yes.