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Hey everyone sorry but im going to rock the boat at little bit but I am all for closed adoptions especially for infants. I think for older children who know and remember their parents other options should be considered for keeping contact but for young children and babies I think things should be closed and Im saying this not as a selfish parent but as an adopted child myself.
I will admit I am very curiouse about my birthmother and family but I would have been VERY confused growing up to have 2 moms I knew about and possibly other half brothers and sisters, and it would have "normalfied" if thats even a word, a broken family. I grew up in a great home with two brothers who were my parents biokids and while I feel a little differnt I would have felt like an OUTCAST had there been other parents to "know about" besides my own and I think putting a concrete face, to the abstract idea of my adoption would have isolated me and caused alot of upset and pain. My parents never hid my adoption and were always very open about me being adopted but they were MY PARENTS and my brothers were MY BROTHERS and to have other people hanging in the wing popping in an out, being "family" but with no resposibilty would have greatly lessened my view,value and feelings of what a family ment.
Im sorry if Im not saying the popular thing its just my point of view and im also looking at it as the example of how I want to raise my own children. While giving a child up for adoption is a truely selfless thing I think this new idea of Open adoptions is a little bit of "Having your cake, and eating it to" at the expense of the child.
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